What if
by TheNerdshipper
Summary: An accident that changes everything. A Shenny story.


After listing to Kate Winslet's What if, I felt inspired to write this story. It my first time writing, so play nice.

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The steady beeps from the monitor was the only thing that assured Penny that he was still alive... but barely. Her shoulder still ached from where she was shoved out of the way of the car. Her heart though was shattered.

Her last words she spoke, well, rather yelled at him was "I hate you!" She turned around to storm off down the street. She barely stepped off the curb when she saw a car blow through a red light. Realizing she had no chance, she balled herself to take the impact of her fatal mistake. For a brief moment, she thought it was odd that she was suddenly flat on the road before she heard the impact. It was a sickening thud. She turned around and saw him slide off the crumpled hood. His once vivid eyes were now void of life. Despite how much she tried to scream his name, nothing could come out.

As she looked upon him in the hospital bed, she never felt so alone. Everyone else had been out of town when the accident happened. Trying to reach them all was the only thing that kept her busy while he was in emergency surgery. Thinking about him was too much. During the 18 hour ordeal, his heart stopped 3 times. The heroic efforts saved his life, but he was now in a coma.

"Here I stand alone

With this weight upon my heart

And it will not go away

In my head I keep on looking back

Right back to the start

Wondering what it was that made you change

Well I tried

But I had to draw the line

And still this question keeps on spinning in my mind

What if I had never let you go

Would you be the man I used to know

If I'd stayed

If you'd tried

If we could only turn back time

But I guess we'll never know"

She grabbed his hand. The tears were flowing freely. Ever since she arrived at the hospital, there wasn't a moment she wasn't crying. Now was no exception.

"Sweetie, Honey, I don't know if you can hear me, but I'm... I'm so sorry. If you ever wake up from this...I...I... you can't leave me. You just can't! After all we been through...what am I going to do without you? You... you were only doing what you thought best... You never... you never... I love you. I really do. You have to wake up and come back to me."

Despite her heart already being broken in two, the anguish she felt was shattering the pieces even more.

Howard and Bernadette were the first ones back. As they came through the door, Penny was already across the room to hug them. Howard had always tried to carry himself with bravado, but seeing his friend lying there helplessly in the bed caused him to break down too.

For several hours, no one could talk. They sat in the room in silence. Each one lost in their heads. Amy sent a text saying that she had just gotten back in to town and was heading to the airport to pick up Raj. About an hour later, both of them joined the rest in the room.

The silence was broken by the ding of an incoming text message. Howard spoke up. "Penny, his plane just landed. He said he needs a ride. Raj and I will go pick him up while he waits for his luggage."

Penny silently nodded and gave both of them another hug as they left the room. Seeing her shaking and trembling, both Amy and Bernadette quickly rushed over for a group hug. The three of them slid down to the floor where Penny continued to cry.

"Bestie, I don't want to pry unnecessary, but what happened? We are here for you."

Bernadette shook her head in encouragement as she rubbed Penny's back.

"I got this text to met him outside across the building. I told him I just got back my commission figures for the month and they were lower than I expected and I really didn't want to go anywhere. He insisted that I come down anyways. I get outside where he proceeds to tell me that I never have to worry about my sales job again. He had called my boss and told him that I was quitting to go back to acting. I was ready to go junior rodeo on him. This is my life, he had no right to do that. He tried to explain himself that I would now have more time to develop my acting career. I yelled at him that I hated him and stormed off. I had just stepped off the curb to go back home when I saw a car run a red light and... and..."

Penny broke down again. After a few minutes, she was able to regain enough composure to resume her story.

"He stepped over and pushed me out of the way of the car. There couldn't have been a momentary hesitation on his part. I saw the car and I thought I was a goner. He saved my life and now he is fighting for his. How is that fair?"

A soft knock on the door interrupted them as Howard and Raj were back. In shock from seeing the condition his friend was in, he stood frozen in the doorway. Seeing the pained look on his face, Penny rushed over to wrap in a hug. He held on to Penny for a moment but continued walking over to the bed. Everyone else joined him at the bedside.

There was another knock on the door and nurse walked in to take vitals and to provide a bed bath. She explained that visiting hours were over. With the exception of immediate family, everyone else had to leave. No one wanted to leave. After being a group for so long, they were practically family. Seeing the look on Penny's face, Bernadette quickly spoke up.

"Alright everyone, you heard the nurse, it time to go." Turning to Penny, she continued, "Penny, call us in the morning with an update."

Penny hugged them all as they left. When they were gone, she took a seat as the nurse continued her job.

"Honey?" the nurse called out to Penny "If you would like, you can help me with his bath."

For the first time since this nightmare started, Penny had a fond smile as she stood up to help.

In what can only be described as a warm grandmother voice, the nurse continued.

"Now listen honey. Things look bad now, but let me tell you something... he is going to pull through. I was there in the room preparing him for surgery. The surgeons were naturally going to do what they could, but you could tell that they were not optimistic. Just as they were about to get started, his eyes burst open. With an unusually confident voice, he cried out your name dear before passing out. Everyone in that room knew at that moment that his 'Penny' was someone very important to him. The mood in the room suddenly changed. The surgeons knew they had a fighter on the table. Someone that was going the distance. Even when his heart stopped three times, they knew he was going to fight to the very end."

After hearing this, Penny's eyes were full of tears. This time though, she had tears of pride.

"Now dear, that man loves you with every fiber of his being. To pull through that mess, there can be nothing else but love." I'm all done here. If you would like, you can crawl up in bed next to him. I have the night shift so if you need anything, you can page me."

Thanking the nurse, Penny waited until the bath items were collected and the door was shut before she crawled into the hospital bed. She pulled the blanket up high and turned off the overhead light. The lights from the various machines illuminated his face in a soft glow.

"Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy Kitty, sleepy kitty, purr purr purr. Sheldon sweetie, please... you have to wake up. I love you. I really do love you. We've been best friends for so long. I don't know why I never saw it before. You were always there for me. I was so angry that you quit my job for me. If only I listened. You know me better than I know myself. All these years I spent with Leonard, it should have been with you. Sheldon, please. Come back to me. We can't change the past, but maybe we can change the future... together."

Before she realized it, she had drifted off to sleep. Her dreams that night was a recollection of all the fun things they have done together over the years. Disneyland, pizza and Thai nights, spaghetti with hotdogs, halo, all of it. It was the first night that she slept truly peacefully.

The morning sun showed through the window onto Penny's face. She blinked her eyes opened. She was feeling usually comfortable and protected. In the middle of the night, she had somehow wrapped her arms around Sheldon. To her amazement, Sheldon had wrapped his arms around her. Not only that, he was also staring right at her. He had a smile on his face. Not his Koala smile, but one that was full of adoration for Penny. Before she could say anything, Sheldon leaned over and gave her a chaste kiss. Tears started to form in her eyes. Placing his hands on her cheeks, he brushed the tears away with his thumb. With a passion and love once lost but was found, they kissed as though they will never have the opportunity again.


End file.
